Hey welcome to my story, I know some of you would love to hear my story, and some of you might be thinking that I am just wasting your time. so those who would like to read my story, thank you for your time and those who are in hurry, don't worry I promise I will keep it short.

Welcome to my childhood, all my childhood, and most of my teenage years I was an insecure kid, fear to stand out, nervous to talk to people, not good-looking, not happening as the girls of my school, not a smart student. I  tried really hard to be like those girls who are happening, who are confident who are beautiful, but I failed every time.

there was a time when I didn't wanna go to school, I didn't wanna face people, whenever I see a handsome guy or his group I used to change my path in the corridor because I Thought I was ugly and I couldn't face them. life was really tough for me or that's what I used to believe at that time, I always used to wake up early and take time to get ready so that I could look beautiful But I can't stop my insecurities and they always popped up. people used to laugh at me, some girls don't want to be my friend because I wasn't the one who can fit into their group, I declared myself as a loser, every time I walk through the corridor the fear and nervousness rush to my veins and I just wanted to be invisible.

one morning a guy from my class came with a plastic toy ring, there was no one in the classroom so he took my hand and tried to put the ring on my finger, tried to propose to me, and at that very moment, I just pulled my hand, not because that I didn't like that guy and yes I didn't have feelings for him but the main reason was my insecurities,  felt that I am not someone who can be someone's girlfriend if  I will say yes, then people will laugh at him, that your girlfriend is ugly and I didn't want people to look at me like that thinking she won't have any quality of beings someone's girlfriend because girlfriends are supposed to be pretty right? so I pulled my hand and I ran out of the classroom, that day I went home, I cried and cried. I didn't know what was happening to me, why I was thinking that everything was falling apart, thinking about why I cannot be like my friends.

I changed my school after the final exams, I told my parents that I want to take science but my school was not giving because my percentage is not fulfilling their criteria to join science so they asked me to take commerce or arts but I want to take science, but the real reason was I don't want to be in that school I want to change school where nobody knows me where I can start afresh, pick up the new identity that I want people to look at.

so I joined a new school and promised myself that I will become someone whom the people from my former school will never Imagine.

I worked on my confidence I tried to self- therapized myself, I  told myself that you can achieve anything you want so I started getting ready for the first day of my new school, I shorten up the skirt of my new uniform, tie a high ponytail put a fitting shirt on, put some shiny lipgloss, and put some mascara and the most important thing was, I heighten up my confidence. 

 I walked through the corridor trying to find my class, I could see that people are looking at me, boys are gazing at me trying to talk to me, some girls came to me and inquired that am I new and I said yes so they welcomed me and helped me to find my class, in-class I was getting all the attentions which I never thought I could ever get. it felt like I am a whole new version of myself or I can say a better version of myself,  I was happy'

In this new school, my only goal was to look good and do better in studies, I didn't want to make friends or know people because I was missing my old friends, so days passed and I was getting all the attention which I have craved for in my previous school, there where people who are actually interested in talking to me. everyone wants me to have in their group, later in just a month, everybody knows me in the school, whether they are junior or senior, everybody. 

I achieved what I want but I missed  my friends and I was in no mood to make new friends because whoever came to me just came because of my popularity and not with the real intention of being a  friend  

I started getting so many friend requests on Facebook, guys started asking my number, some of them asked me for a date, I was getting every attention which I ever wanted

but someone says the very right thing that everything comes with a price  I got attention but I didn't have any real friends, and in my former school I didn't get attention but I had some real friends.

so days passed and I became used to all the fame and later my interest or happiness started fading which I thought was connected with attention or people around me. but I was wrong. 

 one day our biology teacher gave us a group project and I was like ugh why group, I don't want to meet anyone outside the school but I had no choice and I had to be in someone's group  .so I asked people but their group were full and  I don't know what to do so I asked my bench mate, it's so funny, I asked the whole class but not to the person who was just sitting beside me. so I hesitantly asked, are you in some group and she said no and I was like yeah okay and then again I asked can we make a group together and she said we need one more person and I was like yeah, so you know anybody who is left and she pointed towards a girl who was sitting at the corner shying and not talking to anybody so we asked her and we find that she was smiling than usual I mean she was extra sweet, so finally we had a group of three, that is me, Monali and Riya, next day, I and Monali went to Riya's house we started with work but we ended talking and sharing about ourself and slowly we became best friends and I never imagined that How I got such strong friendship without asking for it. they are the coolest people I have ever had in my life 'later we started hanging out and started sharing our feelings and stuff. 

after a year I realized that what I was craving for, that is attention was temporary but what permanent was, to have real people I finally realized that the reason for my insecurities was not that I was ugly but my lack of confidence, my self-doubt. I had zero confidence  that's why I struggled so much in my former school 

it was all in my mind I was the one who didn't accept people and I thought, that they didn't like me, the moment I gained confidence everything changed, it was like I entered a new world.

so it was all in my head, or I can say that I didn't know how to deal with the external things, so with my experience on mental health, I wanna say that things start getting wrong when we don't accept ourselves and start living on other person's validation when we started thinking that material world is superior to the real people or the loved once in our life.

There are so many factors behind this,  metal illness is often physical as well as psychological,

it includes emotional factors, biological factors or genetic factors, or the combination of all.

Mental Illness is not something like diabetes like you know that the blood sugar level has increased so to control it, stop consuming sugar. but to know the cause of the mental illness is not that simple, there are so many mixed emotions and factors which are yet to explore, so it's hard to say what is the exact  reason behind a mental illness

Just like how our physical health affects our mind and our ability to think, its the same way our mental health affects our whole body, 

we heard right that a healthy mind lives in a healthy body, it's exactly the same way.

we cannot say that a healthy person is going through anxiety or depression, if the person is dealing with these terms that means he /she is not healthy, they are not well and we all know that if somebody's not well they need care and help. 

so taking care of your mental health leads to improve the quality of your life, it adds the value, creativity, and ability to think productively, which helps to live life to the fullest and help to take crucial and important decisions in life which improves your living.

always try to clear the purpose of your life, and you can only think constructively if you have a healthy mind. so don't only just run towards your destination, start living your journey. and you can only achieve that with a healthy mind.

okay, so I won't say that I know everything about Improving one's mental health because trust me nobody can help you until and unless you decide to help yourself. but there some steps which you can follow and start from,